Its been months since my last DR… I want to say that Ive been busy, that Ive found other outlets, that life has been to complicated to justify devoting time and energy to this contemplative act. But, Im not really sure why I stopped. Sometimes I wonder if I use this medium more when Im feeling accomplished, or in order to feel that way. Its easier to share your successes than your failures, but I think theres more to be gained from the latter. Learning to channel disappointment into lessons learned is an art that separates the pushers from the accepters.
Finding the time for personal writing and reflection is usually a function of my need to process thoughts and procrastinate in a (somewhat) productive manner. Only when Im swamped with pressing work do I feel the urge to take the time to mediate over this keyboard. Something about writing completely subjective, often readerless words helps me to get my creative juices flowing, so to speak. As thoughtless sketching is to a painter, so journaling is to this budding writer. With most of my endeavors I aim for the unreachable goal of perfection, which, though I know is unattainable, pushes me towards the high caliber of quality which Ive come to expect of myself. It also tends to cause me a perpetual dissatisfaction with most of what I produce, even in its most finalized, polished state. But here on this blog, with the entire world not watching, I feel free to rabble on about nothing, or something, with no end in mind. Freedom in black and white.